Kick Satan in the teeth!

So today was rough in a couple ways. First, I totally forgot about a meeting I had tonight for work. In forgetting about said meeting, I forgot to get the group packets together for said meeting. Second, an slew of emails have come in on a different email account that I don't check regularly, so I missed the reminder about the meeting tonight. Third, I am getting ready for aunt flow to come and it has been kicking my butt mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I consistently have a million thoughts running through my head at any given moment. Needless to say, it's been hard to take them things captive like Jesus taught me to. (See 2 Corinthians 10:5)

So on top of all that, I had a tense moment with my husband earlier today and my emotions got the best of me. I cried a lot this afternoon and I'm not proud of it. In my tension, all kinds of negative thoughts were roaming around in my head. Thoughts like "everyone would be better off without me", and "I am always the problem", and "I'm not cut out for this life". These were all really horrid thoughts and it was really Satan playing on my past trauma and the messages people spoke over me while growing up. It got really ugly really fast. Those thoughts in combat with the Truth that God has spoken over me. The truth of "I am fearfully and wonderfully made", and "I am loved by a faithful God", and "God loves me with a reckless kind of love". The Truth of Gods love was not penetrating my fortress of darkness and gloom in that moment.

Then I got out of the truck and had to put my "happy" face on. Once away from the shell of despair, I got to see the light. Those thoughts of leaving this earth left me, and I got to focus on picking out blueberries 🫐. Yes, random I know, but that little distraction is what I needed at the time to get out of Satans trap. On the way home, I was reminded of how much God loves me and Jeremiah 29:11 came to mind, it says "For I know the plans I have for you." Declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future" (NIV). The Holy Spirit knew what would bring life back to me and that was the spiritual kick to Satans teeth!

I need to give homage to the people in my life that also speak life into me. I am so grateful for my tribe because they remind me of whose I am. They have helped bring me back to Gods reality so many times, and I can't thank them enough.

When we are down in the emotional pits, Satan likes to play tricks on us, really on our thoughts. Satan would have us believe we are worthless and useless when we really aren't. We are worth more than gold to God, heck all His thoughts about us amount to the grains of sand on the entire planet! (See Plasm 139:17-18). I know it can be hard to remember those things when you're in battle (the spiritual kind), but we must stand strong and keep fighting darkness with Gods light. You are not alone in this, God is always with you in the form of His Holy Spirit. I also want to encourage you to pray for Godly friends. Trust me, if you ask God to bring you friends that are in relationship with Him, He will gladly do it.

I love you friend. I'm here for you always. 💕

P. S.

Oh and I made it to the meeting tonight, life was spoken into me and it was awesome. I didn't feel bad after all that happened today. I was being more rough on myself than I needed to be.